I have never considered myself rich, in monetary terms. But in the last couple of weeks, my “acute” financial limitations ha,ve become more apparent. Apart from the generally reduced purchasing power caused by inflation and the prevailing economic circumstances, the pervading poverty in the land and my helplessness in the face of it all has me feeling frustrated. And then it dawned on me – many of us are deluded that we are comfortable when we are in actual fact poor.
They are the Mac daddy of modern day Nigeria, the ones who call the shots in every sphere of society. The richest, the “baddest,” and as we like to say over here, the ones who run things. You cannot go wrong if you aspire to become a politician in this space. The good news is that unlike many other parts of the world where you have to have some sort of pedigree or accomplishment in order to be taken seriously in politics, you do not necessarily have go through the stressful process of building some pointless pedigree over here. It’s why it’s important for you to know what it takes to be regarded as a politician through and through, and not just a charlatan.
It is stale gist that the most attractive and lucrative career in this part of the world right now is the whistle-blowing profession. Since the government at the center made the whistle-blowing policy that would see anyone who has authentic information regarding where stolen monies are hidden receive 5 percent of the recovered sum last December, there has been an increasing number of discoveries of unbelievable amounts of looted cash by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission.
Since I published the piece on how to be a respected female in Nigeria here, I have received quite a number of requests to do a similar piece on what it takes to be respected as a man in Nigeria, mostly by the men of course. One would understand why it was relatively easy for me to write the article on the woman. It’s obvious, I am female, so it’s definitely easier for me to relate with my ilk. However, based on my observation of the Nigerian society, where the values are quite different from those of countries in the Western world especially, I’ll attempt to give the guys some tips on how to be respected in this interesting this part of the world.
For the purpose of this article, let me quickly clarify that in this context, female refers to a lady/woman who’s 25 years of age and above. Now, regardless of your background, qualifications, achievements, physical appearance or social standing, to be considered worthy of respect (which naturally translates to being successful) as a female in Nigeria, you have to first of all understand the peculiarity of the society you live in. And not just that, you must be willing to align your way of life to the realities of the Nigerian society. But, you need not worry about it. I’m here to lend a helping hand, as I discuss five foolproof ways to ensure you are respected as a woman in Nigeria. Let’s get right into it!
Mudslinging. Witty comments. Slander. Egotistic Overlords. Muckraking. And downright gutter fighting. Welcome to Nigerian Twitter, the home of drama, melodrama and more drama. This is not to suggest that there are no upsides to this fascinating social media platform. I tell anyone who cares to listen that Twitter is by far my favourite online social networking site. There’s just something about it that never fails to entertain or inform at any given time. For one, it projects far less pretentiousness and fake life compared to its Facebook and Instagram counterparts. Its uniqueness is also seen in the bench mark of 140 character messages that one is limited to in expressing a thought. As a writer, the brevity of words one is confined to on Twitter appeals to my creative side. A characteristic that stands it out from other social media platforms.
My childhood friend got married penultimate Saturday, and I was there to celebrate with her. Prior to her wedding, it had been a while since I last attended an “Owambe”- the local parlance for parties which literally means “it’s happening there.” I had almost lost touch with all the flamboyance and paraphernalia that usually accompanies such celebrations like weddings, birthdays and burial ceremonies, but once again was reminded that nobody throws and knows how to “work” a party like the Nigerian. As the latter part of the year when parties will most likely be thrown in quick succession approaches, it is important to know how to thoroughly enjoy a Nigerian party. Let’s get right into those things you have to consider to leave a party satisfied and glad that you attended;
Nigerians are a very special breed of people who possess unique qualities that only they could have been blessed with. Today, I will be attempting to help you recognize a full blooded Nigerian when you see one. If you are a Nigerian who has lived mostly in the diaspora, especially if you didn’t spend your formative years here, you may not be able to relate with the characteristics I will be highlighting, sorry… but that only suggests that you are not a typical Nigerian. But hey, all hope is not lost, you would definitely learn one or two things from this piece which if well practiced will confer on you the distinct privilege of being considered a Nigerian through and through. Without further ado, the following are the characteristics you must possess to be a Nigerian;
Away from all things too serious, I am sharing an extra post this week. I will be writing on something that has always fascinated me…”The Lagos Big Girl Tag.” The city of Lagos is regarded as a land of opportunities where people come in search of the golden fleece that is often talked about. Everyone wants to be seen as “doing well” or “making it.” Now, the ways of achieving that aim differ from person to person. Today, I will be attempting to assist the ladies who aspire to be tagged “Lagos Big Girls.” Feel free to scratch Lagos and insert the name of your city of residence.